Forgiving your Spouse

Bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so should you- Colossians 3:13

I believe that in order to have the marriage God wants you to have, you must go through the fire personally and as a couple.  All couples face trials and will either get through it together or let it tear them apart.

When I decided to begin an encouraging blog and website for marriages, I knew that our marriage would face trials because God wants us to continue growing everyday towards Him in order to be perfected into His image.  We faced trials at the beginning of our relationship and still face them pretty often.  Just recently we faced something that was truly meant for me individually, because I needed to grow as a woman, a woman who respects her husband.  Although my husband was the one that I thought was in the wrong, God used the opportunity to teach me about forgiveness.

I did not want to admit I was wrong because I was extremely prideful and thought I “knew” what was best for the family.

I started going to bed angry, bitter, and thought to myself, “I’m just not going to talk to him all day tomorrow that’ll teach him”.  I grabbed the blankets and went upstairs to the loft and wanted to sleep on the ground, I did not care how uncomfortable it would be.  As I started to shut my eyes, something whispered in my ear to go downstairs and lay in bed, humbling myself to my husband.  “NO WAY!!!” I yelled in my head, eventually caved in.  As I lay in bed next to my husband, I started to cry because I was so angry with him.  I felt God was telling me to forgive him even though I “felt” he was in the wrong, which if you’re anything like I am, you fight the feeling of forgiving the other person.  But even though it might sound cliché, two wrongs do not make a right. 

Whether my husband was wrong or I was wrong, it did not matter, I had to let go and forgive him.  I turned around, hugged him and said I’m sorry.  I may have felt I did not do anything wrong, but I did not want our sleep ruined by any type of anger. 

Do you find yourself just “expecting” the other person to say their sorry when deep down you could be the one to put out the fire?  Sometimes we are the ones who have to submit and just let the issue go because we are the ones who have the power to end the fight. 

Today, if your spouse and you are having a feud, I encourage you and challenge you to pick up that phone, send them a text if you have to, and forgive them.  You begin to feel something inside of you that let’s you release the anger, especially going back to having friendship in your marriage.

Thank you for our spouses, You have really blessed us with the blessing of a lifetime.  I pray that as we feel ourselves prideful and angry, unable to forgive our spouses, You remind us that You forgave us even when we didn’t deserve it.  Thank You for being loving and merciful.

In Your name Jesus Amen!

For His glory,


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