Embracing the Changes in Your Life

Change// (verb) Make or become different 

I have been a Navy wife for going on 3 years and there is one thing I have learned to do: embrace uncertainty (changes in our lives).  Being in the military and being a wife to someone who can deploy or change stations at the drop of a hat can be stressful.  Let me be honest, I love change and have learned to be okay with it, but often times when you are given a change of duty station in 2 weeks, you have major anxiety.  I see it all the time on my newsfeed and military groups on Facebook, "we still don't have a date for the movers to come pick up our stuff.  Ugh!  Anyone deal with this?"  Let me just say about 100 comments later the same thing is said, "Girl that's military life."

The frustration is real!  The anxiety and stress are real!  The anger is real when your husband comes home and tells you he FINALLY was given orders right?  Usually, those orders are a month in advance but still.  You have to move your entire life in a month, like seriously?  But there is one thing I have learned in the past years is this:

The Creator of Heaven and Earth is teaching me to embrace the change and run with it

Ever single day something is changing in our lives.  Your child slept through the night and now is up every 2 hours teething (can I get an amen?).  Your child loved black beans yesterday and now she ALL OF A SUDDEN throws them on the ground and makes a frowny face.  Our lives as spouses are forever changing, especially when it comes to this lifestyle our men and women chose.  Learning to embrace the change is less stress, anger, frustration, and anxiety.  

So how can you as a military spouse learn to go with the flow even if the flow is terrible and rocky?  Here are 3 tips on what has helped me:

1. Don't take it out on your spouse.  Yes, I said it.  It is not their fault that the lifestyle they chose is forever changing.  They need our support to make it easier for them since their jobs can be extremely stressful.  Come on ladies and gentlemen it's hard but let's not make it harder for them.  Support goes a long way with our men and women of service.  Which leads me to the next one.

2. Pray for them. One of the best ways to support your spouse is by praying for them and over them during a time of change.  The life of a spouse is tough, add military life in there and you have a 9/10 of toughness.  From dealing with the change to all the infidelity that occurs in the military, to having to make friends with every single move, it is hard.  Inviting God to help your marriage and to strengthen it with His Holy Spirit takes that heavy burden from your shoulders, onto the Lord.

3. Find encouraging, positive friends or be the positive friend. Here's the harsh reality of military life: there are some extremely miserable spouses and they love to take down other men and women.  Be the light in such a hard lifestyle because you might be the only positive thing in their life.  Yes, it doesn't mean be fake and always have a smile on your face because life does happen.  I don't have all rainbows and butterflies in my life, but I love to be a positive friend to those around me.  

Finally, my amazing military friends, be there for one another.  During the holidays, stress is at an all-time high.  Talk positively to one another and encourage one another to enter the New Year with a positive mindset. 

For His Glory,
Liz Graham

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